The things that break you, will also be the same things that make you. It’s been 5 years since I lost Justin. It’s been 4 years since I lost Wendy. It’s been 3 years since I lost my brother, and 5 weeks since my mom died. God the fucking hurt… hurts. LOVE MOVED FIRST As I mentally wrap up another September, I’m reminded of this: love will absolutely move first . I have spent so many nights praying for all of this to change. For whoever is listening up there to make my life easier. I’ve spent sleepless nights up in arms with God begging Him to make this easier…

I hate all three. Here’s what I know about life : It will break you way before you’re ready. Most of the time you never see it coming. The difference on the rare occasions that you do see it coming? Nothing. It hurts. All of it. I’d rather park a mile out of my way than parallel park under pressure. I am terrified to fly. The comfortable familiarity of saying goodbye to people I love, is an uncomfortable amount. But! Parallel parking gets me closer to where I need to go, and flying gets me there faster. So I do them. I do things under pressure now and I do…

Is hard. Even when you expect it, it’s hard. This planet just keeps getting emptier for me. This next chapter is gonna fucking sting. I love you forever mama. Hug Justin and Wendy up there for me, would ya? Until Next Time, ~A Ps. Don’t forget you promised me butterflies 💜🤟🏻🦋🦋🦋 08/15/1953- 09/02/2023

If I’m the queen of anything, I’m the queen of fear. I’m literally scared all of the fucking time. Scared to speak, scared to win, scared to live, and so mother fucking scared to lose… again. Fear is easy, love is fucking hard. My heart hurts more than usual these days. Fear is easy, love is hard. There is nothing easy about my life. I’ve been dealt the shittiest hand. I miss my life before it was wrecked. Fear is EASY, love is hard. There isn’t a day that goes by that I can wrap my head around any of this. I’ve asked God so many times to give me…